i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
