am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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