Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Randomize
