babies were throwing up all over the place
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize