i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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