Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize