We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
