Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Randomize
