shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
