And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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