yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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