You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
