THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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