What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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