When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
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