I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
