yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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