is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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