The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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