Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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