living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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