Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
so explain again why im purple
no
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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