my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
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The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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