Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
