Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
