Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
