he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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