Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize