She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
