If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The beers last night were like the tears from god
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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