Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
My brain says no but my pants say off.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize