My hand turned me down
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
