Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
