you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
