New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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