My first STD was from a foam party
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
