I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
