It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
God I need to hump something, right now.
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