his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Randomize
