this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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