literally had 100 drinks last night.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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