I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
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