You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
