TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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