he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
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