I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis