You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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