Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
My life is pants optional.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize