What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Randomize
