Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
