Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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